Greatest Newspaper Headline of All Time

"Beavers battle Cougars in Sin City"

Comments

[Eric]

Another great headline, this time in the Seattle Times, reporting on a NCAA Womens Basketball game:

"Husky Women Subdue Ducks"

(UW v. Oregon, 1990 - I actually saw this one; Dave Barry picked it up sometime later)

http://community.seattletimes.nwsource.com/archive/?date=19900218&slug=1056684

[XWL]

After BYU beat Oregon State 44-20, they could have gone with the postgame headline of,

"Cougars pound Beavers in Sin City".

(There must already be an 'adult' film featuring an all female cast by that name)

[T. Shaw]

Here's one (not nearly as good as yours) from the December 11, 2009 issue of New York Outdoors news.

"Numbers of tree stand falls climbing"

I assume the editor saw the irony.

[Mike G]

Years ago, the Wichita Eagle contained this gem. The Board of Regents of the state college system was a popular gig for retired bigshots, and in this case the governor appointed the former speaker of the Kansas House, one Wendell Lady, and the former head of the University of Kansas, one Archie Dykes, producing the wonderful...

"Lady, Dykes Appointed to Board of Regents"

[Tim]

Actual best "Beavers no match for Trojans" from a previous Beavers game.

[TomH]

Saw this on an Alabama paper site: "Lady Vols beat Cocks"

Tenn vs. S. Carolina

[schizuki]

"Headless Body in Topless Bar"

New York Post.

[john]

"headless body in topless bar" nypost April 15, 1983

[AC1]

"Hunt for Co-op Bum Sniff Deviant"

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2779253/Hunt-for-shop-nut-who-smelled-staff-members-bum.html

[fustian]

Well, I went to Oregon State and we always hoped to play the Carolina GameCocks just to hear the play-by-play: "...and the Cocks are continuing to penetrate the Beaver defense..." "...the Cocks are flaccid in the face of the Beaver onslaught..."

We even had a nice slogan: "nobody can lick our beavers..."

And, of course, our main rival was the Oregon Ducks. Can anyone think of a good rhyme for Duck?

[Seb]

Headless Body in Topless Bar

-NY Post, 04/15/1983

[Docrich]

Don't forget the classic NY Post" Headless Body in Topless Bar," or the more recent "Welcome to New York--Now Die"(about the KSM trial.)

[Jeff]

Nope, sorry - have to respectfully disagree with all of the above. For my money, the winner and still reigning champion comes from the April 15, 1983 issue of the New York Post -

"HEADLESS BODY IN TOPLESS BAR."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:NYPost.jpg

[Rick L.]

12/23/09 Nashua (N.H.) Telegraph

"Conant Holds Off Frisky Cougars"

http://www.nashuatelegraph.com/sports/highschoolsports/495621-221/conant-holds-off-frisky-cougars.html

[misterdregs]

HEADLESS BODY IN TOPLESS BAR (New York Post, 1982)

[JayDee]

Newhall (CA) Signal, 1979, above a photo of the new Valencia librarian who had a PHD in Linguistics and a number of academic awards:

"A Cunning Linguist Moves To Valencia"

[FredP]

"Nut Screws and Bolts" was about a mental patient who raped a nurse and escaped from the insane asylum. (But I'm not sure it actually appeared in print; I think it might have been in a work of fiction.)

[orthodoc]

Better than "Headless Body in Topless Bar?" Or "Axis of Weasels?" I think not.

[Stanley]

Another great one from the Seattle Times:

City to Give SLUT More Money

The South Lake Union Transit (SLUT) is a trolley line around the north end of downtown Seattle that is called the Slut.

[dch]

Hello-"Headless body found in topless bar"

[Darren]

What about the headline when Ike Turner died?
Ike Beats Tina To Death

[Whitehall]

"Headless Sex Debunked"

In the San Francisco Chronicle reporting on a entomologist convention where there was a paper delivered about the sex life of the praying mantis.

[The Gold Tooth]

Greatest newspaper headline? That's easy.

A headline on the front page of The Jersey Journal of April 7, 1980 teased a story about the horrible traffic mess New York City experienced on the first work day of the new week after the city's subway and bus unions had gone on strike over the weekend. The headline? "Sick transit gory on Monday."

I have a framed copy on the wall by my desk, which I gaze at with awe from time to time.

[FortWorthGuy]

In the run-up to the University of Washington vs. the University of South Carolina women's basketball game, the headline could read: "Husky Women Ready to Take on Cocks".

[tim maguire]

When I was a student at the University of Florida in the late 80's, a stripper Gainesville was murdered; the prime suspect was a guy named Lamb.

The headline in The Gainesville Sun: Seven Witnesses Tie Lamb to Slain Dancer.